Attractively lively and animated, bubbling with enthusiasm and exuberance which flow effortlessly from an endless natural spring within the heart of the vivacious person, this is vivacità.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Chicken Tetrazzini

A horrid event occurred in my life seven days after my last post here. Explosions of pain, suffering, grief. Waves of soul-wounding darkness, followed by a completely unrelated storm that crashed soon after. A person hunkers down into survival mode. Hunkered and surviving is where I've been since July of 2010, slowly finding the courage to come out of the fox hole, to capture life again, and then, to live.

Much has happened to me because of events over which I had no control. Strength has been discovered, and fear. Jolts of reality, disillusionment, discouragement, and mistrust have forced self-evaluation, decisions, forgiveness, priority. During the recovery and healing process I wondered if I'd ever feel like 'me' again? Would my smile return, my laugh, my love of writing, my joy of foods and cooking?

Slowly all have returned, better and brighter than before. Like a beautiful gem I've found that the fierce rubbing of my heart has brought out the shine.

Family meals, once taken for granted, are now joyous celebrations, each and every one. Flowers, candles, laughter, lovely dishes, and perfect food. It's true that appreciation grows deeper once a thing is nearly lost.

I'm back. Heart and soul healed. Any moment a threatening crisis can intrude, crashing, crumbling beauty, washing it away. But only for a time. Beauty remains in the heart. It burns always, triumphantly, though sometimes imperceptively. Survivors fight for beauty, for life, for peace, for restoration, for love.

And sometimes seven months after a storm they make a Chicken Tetrazzini for their family, with love. And in the serving, savoring, and lingering there is a moment, a magical, special correcting moment, recognized. The last remnants of pain completely dissipate. Months-long heartache is set free. It floats away on the laughter, the moans of ecstasy over the experience of deliciousness. In that space there is the realization that the long dark trek is over; the light has been reached. Time heals wounds. Love conquers all. And beautiful food exploding with flavor, texture, and color comforts, confirms, assures. Releases. Restores a hurting family into a happy family once again.

The desire to tackle a new recipe for my family's joy has proven to me that my heart has mended. It is able to express its cherishing, is brave enough to expose vulnerability again, to risk failure. Deep, deep relief and appreciation to the One who never lets me go.

'The storm has passed, family. We are strong. We made it. Eat, drink, be merry. Where there is love there is a Way through and out and into the arms of the One who reconciles masterfully. We are here. We are here...together. L'Chaim! To Life!'

Click here for Giada De Laurentiis' Chicken Tetrazzini recipe.